A Wilderness Wife - PART III by Karen MacEanruig

The girls hand was trembling in his so he led her inside to his bedroom and went back to Ned and the ledge to sleep.  Molly joined each one of them sometime in the night but she seemed to reconnoiter and come back to Luke for approval.  Luke lay there hoping the shooting stars they had seen were just that and not some secret device of some sort being shot from or off of satellites. Maybe they are shooting each other’s satellites down, he thought. Even if the government didn’t find them they could be at the mercy of roving bands of soldiers or mercenaries. 

He lay in the night wondering how he had ended up with three dependents.  Ned was a good worker and had a good short term memory so he could follow directions exactly.  He was also pretty stable as long as he felt included.  Marty was smart and picked up everything he told her quickly but she felt it was her lot to be used by Luke, she would make the best of things if he went to her now and took her tonight but it would start their relationship off on the wrong foot.  He wanted more than fear and compliance from her.  He needed a mother for strong sons, a companion to talk with.  Now that she was here he wanted her to be excited about the new house, about having his children.  He wanted a calm home with clean, clear relationships.

And Martha’s son, the boy she named Martin, after herself, Luke was already fond of the little guy.  He lay there wondering how long until little Marty would be walking.  That was the healing period he had given Martha.  During that time he would try to make her less fearful and more a part of plans and decisions. The boy was already crawling and would make a bee line for Luke whenever he sat down in the sod house.  I guess I’ve decided he thought to himself, we stay here until Martha is healed and the baby can walk and then we’ll rethink the possibilities.   Right now they all needed the stable home to help forge and tune their relationships.  

The next morning he smelled breakfast cooking when he woke.  He pulled on his outer clothes and boots and went into the cooking area whistling a melody he remembered.   She had made the tea he liked out of dried leaves from a bush on the ridges

.  During the cold of winter he boiled the bark itself and the beverage was much stronger and heartier.   He sat at the table drinking the light leaf tea and when the baby began to fuss Luke picked him up and dipped a clean rag in his cooling tea and between his finger and the rag little Marty was sucking up tea from the cloth.

Martha had his breakfast ready and came up with the filled wooden platter.  She set it on the table and started to take the baby but Luke continued to feed the baby until he began to nod off again. 

“Good Morning, Martha,” Luke greeted her, “Has Ned eaten?” he asked.”

“He’s out playing with Molly,” Martha told him.    

“Do you have enough cooked for all of us?” Luke asked. 

She bridled, “Yes, but I’m not wasting, I promise,” she said hurriedly. 

He touched her hand, “Martha, I just think we should all eat together at the table and say grace.”

“I should bath the baby,” she said.

“Why don’t you take little Marty with you to the pool this afternoon when you bathe, I think it’s warm enough?” Luke said.  

He was still holding the baby and grinning down at him and Martha brought the cradle over and called Ned into breakfast. 

When Ned had washed up and Martha had joined them, Luke put the baby in the cradle and opened the Bible and read from a story in the Old Testament about a woman named Ruth and her husband and in-laws.  He left the Bible at the end of the table open at the book he read and said a short blessing before they ate.

After they ate Luke kept Ned at the table while Martha cleaned up from breakfast and he had a long talk with the man/boy about farming and why it was better than hunting for a stable food supply.  Martha listened too and Luke made sure she could hear it all.  Ned liked the no shooting part and he would get the farming cycles over time as Luke explained where their food came from.  Ned would see this winter how the supplies dwindled and know by spring how important planting was to their year. 

“Neddie, I just want you to know that we’ll work hard here but we’ll try to be happy too,” Luke told him. 

“Maybe, I can have a dog again?” Ned asked. And a little house for me and the dog?”

“If you still want that next summer we’ll try to make it happen, Ned, but only after we have the sowing and harvesting done.  That always comes first, understood?”  Luke asked.

Ned raised his hand, “I promise,” he said.

Luke shook his hand and clapped him on the back, “Good man, Ned.  We have work to do, can you wait outside while I talk to Martha about dinner?”

Ned was happy to escape the confines of the house and Luke turned to Martha, “Come sit for a minute, Martha.”

Her head was lowered as she came to the table to get his instructions.  Luke gritted his teeth.  Why the hell was she so afraid; her fear upset Luke.

“Martha,” Luke said, “I was a soldier but I never raped anyone.”

She looked in his eyes.

“I ran from the army and the government because I want a happy life.  I don’t want to kill or be killed.  I want to be free and at peace with everyone in my home.”

“Do you think you could ever be happy here?” he asked her.

She looked at him openly for the first time, “I wish the soldiers had never happened, except for Martin,” she admitted.  “My uncle was always that way,” she said, “Even when I was a little girl.”

He shook his head, realizing the extent and depth of her injuries. 

He took her hand and kissed it softly, “I’m sorry about what happened to you Martha and whatever happened to Ned and I’m even a little sorry about what happened to me when they took me to be a soldier.”

He turned to her, “I want to try and make the best of what’s left,” he told her.

She frowned and shook her head, yes.  “I’ll try, Luke,” she smiled softly, “I promise.”

“There’s no rush, little mama, let’s plan the wedding for after harvest time,” he said. 

“A wedding?” she asked.

“We’ll have the whole winter to honeymoon and make a new baby,” Luke said. 

“What about Martin?” she asked Luke.

“After the wedding, Marty will be my eldest son,” Luke said with a promise.  A strong boy that he raised would be a good son, Luke decided.  Luke was glad that Ned had asked for his own cabin.  It would be better for his family and he would try to get Ned his puppies. 

They went through the rest of the stores and decided on dinner then Luke went out and joined Ned for a lesson in kitchen gardening. 

“If we have time to make a cabin for you this year we can plant the garden next year and you can be self-sufficient without hunting Ned,” Luke said. 

“No more shooting,” Ned agreed happily.

Luke spent the summer teaching Ned to carry on if something should ever happen to him.  He told Ned that he and Martha would be married in the fall after harvest time.

“Will you hurt my sister too?” Ned asked.

Luke sighed deeply, “No Ned, I won’t hurt her.  I want her to be happy,” Luke told him.  He raised his hand, “I promise,” he told Ned, hoping it was true.

He walked Martha and Martin to the pool each late afternoon and they walked back through the garden selecting dinner and the following breakfast.  He didn’t touch her sexually on those occasions but tried to make his touch more normal to her by touching her affectionately as he did the baby.  She learned to fear him less as time passed and she was preparing some material in her trunk for ‘the wedding’, and mending and sewing for Ned and Luke.

Luke brought her flowers from the fields occasionally and gave her special supplies from his stores.  He noticed that she especially enjoyed the evenings when he read to all of them from the Bible and the other book he read.  It was written by a woman who had lived in early America as a ‘friend.’  It was a particular denomination but Luke didn’t know much about denominations so he just read it as a Christian journey.  He gave it to Martha when Ned told him it was her birthday.

That evening when dinner was finished he told Martha to sit at the table with the baby while he and Ned cleaned up the kitchen and then he presented her with a little honey berry cake and the wrapped book.  Ned gave her some small bones he had that Luke told him could be made into needles if they bored small holes in the very end.  Ned was happy he had pleased his sister and Luke.

That evening little Marty almost walked three steps and Martha looked at Luke with alarm.  Luke laughed and picked Marty up and tossed him in the air making him giggle and drool with delight.  Ned laughed and Molly got excited and barked as he played with the baby.  Without thinking Martha enjoyed it with the rest of them. 

Luke walked her to her room as usual only tonight he entered the room and helped her put the baby down.  It was the first time he had entered the room since he had turned it over to Martha.  He took her hand after the baby was down and walked back to the door.  He put his arms around her waist and softly kissed her mouth, all gentle and soft while running his fingers through her long shiny hair.  He turned and left before she had time to go into fear or flight mode and she was left with his soft, warm kiss.        

The next day they left early for the pool and her bath.  The days were getting shorter and after the bath Luke sat with her on the warm rocks and asked her if she had time to read any of the book he had given her. 

“I thought I should wait until winter when there is less work,” she said.

“Sometimes we need nourishment at odd moments," Luke said, "Read when you can,"  he told her, "and we'll talk about it in the evening."

He took her small hand into his broken fists, “Have you decided, little mama, will you marry me?” he asked. 

“Luke…,” she couldn’t say more.

 She took a deep breath, “Luke, I wish I could promise what you want,” she said.

“Ah, little mama, just promise that you’ll try…,” Luke said, “and keep on trying.  Just promise that we’ll keep trying together for each other and our children.  Until death do us part,” he said.

  She looked straight into his eyes, “I can promise you that,” she promised.  “When should we get married?” she asked with a need to know look.  “There are things that need to be done,” she said. 

Good, he thought, she also had preparations to make.

The next day Luke worked with Ned on his cabin and he took a late afternoon walk to one of the nearby ridges.  His knife took out the mama wolf with barely a whimper and he took two pups, one for himself and one for Ned.  He was sorry and asked for forgiveness after disposing of the mother and her other babies. He knew it was a cruel self-indulgent act, a waste of resources and he mourned for the pack he had destroyed.     

He winked at Martha when he got home and hid the puppies in her bedroom after showing them to her.  After Ned went to bed with his new puppy, a gift from Luke and Martha, Martha came to him and kneaded his forehead and ran her hands through his hair.  He allowed himself to enjoy the care she showed. 

When he pulled her down next to him on the bench at the table she expected the worst.

He turned to her and said, “Thank you, Martha. Thank you for understanding."

“I’m sure you know the way to your room by now,” he smiled at her gently and started outside but she followed. 

They sat in the dark at the entrance to the sod house and talked for hours as they looked at the stars.  They shared things they had never discussed and talked about times before the war and rape and killing.  He brought her a blanket and brewed some winter tea at the small campfire.  He wrapped Martin well and they watched the sun rise together after sharing the night and their childhood hopes and dreams. 

She was a good woman and knew the Bible and other books.  She would never be naive about people he thought and she was a good mother and would be a good wife at least as far as so called duties went.  What they made of the rest of it was up to them both, he thought.  

She laid on her bed knowing Luke would be a better father to Martin than any other man she would ever find and he would be a good father to any other babies she might birth.  He would be a loyal father and husband and even allow her to read and talk with him about the Bible.  He would provide and see to their safety before his own and be kind to Ned.  She just wished she could be the wife he seemed to want.  She didn’t even know what kind of woman that was.  Not like uncle seemed to think, or her father, or anyone else she knew.  Luke seemed to want to start from scratch.  No pasts, no guilt, no whores of Babylon in his mind, just his peaceful valley and what they could make. But would he change his mind once he had her, like all the other men.  She would see, what she saw, Martha decided, it wasn’t something she could know.

Luke caught up with Ned after breakfast that morning. 

“Ned,” Luke said quietly.

Ned turned and listened to Luke.

“Let’s sit down, Ned.  I’m about to get married and I need a man’s opinion,” Luke said.

Ned stopped at that and sat on a rock. 

“Ned, usually a groom gives the bride a ring, but I don’t have a ring.  Usually, the groom has a job and a future, but I don’t even have that,” Luke said. 

“Ned, you’re the bride’s only living relative and you have to decide whether to let me have her as a bride,” Luke told Ned. “And then,” Luke said and paused, “You have to decide whether to stay with us in Right Fork,” Luke said to him.

Ned seemed worried.

“Do you want to talk to Martha?” Luke asked Ned.                      

“Yes, it’s too hard,” Ned answered.

“No problem, Ned, go talk to your sister about Martin and other babies and what you should do,” Luke told the boy/man.

Luke sighed, he had made the options as clear to Ned as he could and Martha too, he thought.  Now he would see what they would decide.  He was digging roots in the kitchen garden when Ned came out. 

He ran to Luke and pounding him on the shoulder.  “She doesn’t care about a ring,” Ned said, “Or the other stuff, and she wants me to stay in the valley somewhere.”

Luke embraced Ned, “I’m glad buddy, I didn’t want to lose you,” Luke said. 

“Ned was happy again and wanted to see his cabin.”

“The harvest was bountiful once again and Luke rejoiced and they had a fall bonfire with thanksgiving and celebration and then on a solemn day after the crops were stored and what little hunting that needed to be done for the dogs was complete, Luke and Martha married and Ned gave her to Luke and moved to his new home with his wolf pup.

Luke just gentled Martha the first night and continued to read to her from Ruth as she prepared his meals and went about her duties.  Luke was gentle and thoughtful and one night he came in from scouting the valley a little late and she was on the bed in the moonlight fully clothed and Marty was asleep near the fireplace.

Luke stripped and lie beside her cuddling but not waking her. She woke slowly and panicked when she found him naked but she was curious and wanted to see the brutal instrument that pounded, attacked, entered, and hurt, her, making babies grow inside of her, and making her a whore, soiled and spoiled forever. 

  She looked and thought maybe he wasn’t as big as other men.  It seemed to be asleep as he was asleep.  She stared and soon touched the shriveled thing.  She jumped as it came to life in her hand.  He opened one eye and grinned at her. 

She scurried off the bed and he laughed.  She looked and it was resting again after her retreat.

She sat on the edge of the bed and peered at his maleness ready to retreat at any moment.  

“You see this?” Luke asked.

Martha shook her head, a bit curious since it was her husband and not a rapist. 

“God designed this to enter you slowly and put sperm in you to make your eggs fertile so that a man and a woman can have babies,” Luke said. 

“Why does it have to hurt so much?” she asked.

“I don’t think it’s supposed to hurt,” he told her, “If anything I do every hurts you we’ll stop,” Luke promised. 

She believed him and told him her periods had started again. 

He smiled and held her close without intent and she let him enjoy her soft, smooth skin.  She liked that he enjoyed her and it pleased her even more when he noticed her during the day when they were both dressed.  She even tried to get his attention when he seemed preoccupied. 

One day at the pool she felt a new sensation when she looked up to find his eyes raking her naked body half submerged in the pool.  He stripped slowly while she watched and sliced the water cleanly before her in the warm pool.  They played in the water and then he lifted her and stepped down from the boulder into the soft grass and laid her there tasting and kissing her whole body while she experience her first desire and lost her fear of him completely in her growing need to complete the sensation she felt.  She grew brave and touched his manhood, wanting it, needing to feel its fullness in her.  He made sure she was fulfilled before he spent his sperm inside of her.  He told her his sperm were swimming a mighty race for the honor of fertilizing her egg and making a baby and they prayed together that it be a strong egg and sperm and teased each other about whether it would be a sister or brother to Martin.

They made love often now and each morning Luke looked at her stomach and sometimes even touched her to see if it was getting bigger.  She smiled peacefully knowing that this baby would be loved.  Luke never stopped his attention to Martin and often would put the boy on his shoulders and walk the land telling Martin that someday it would be his and his and his brothers and sisters.   One afternoon he asked      Martha if she could join one of their rambles and she packed a lunch and they set off for a sunny meadow that Luke loved.  After a picnic in their warm field of wild flowers Luke scooped some of the flowers out of the grasses and put them into a gunny sack.  When they got home to the cabin Martha put Martin down and Luke set out the flowers in beds around the foundation of the cabin.  He sat and enjoyed the flowers until she came out and joined him.  The rock enclosed beds made the cabin feel loved and well kept. 

Luke played his flute and just before they went in Martha told him she had a surprise.  Luke’s eyebrows raised and he smiled in anticipation. 

“I think we’re going to have a baby, Luke.” She said shyly.

Luke let out a big whoop and danced her around the small fire.  “Another baby,” he grinned happily. 

“Maybe a little Martha,” he teased her.

“Or a big Luke,” she smiled back at him.

“When will we know for sure?” he asked.

“I’m two weeks late,” she said, “And I’m usually right on schedule.”

He took both of her hands and said, “Let’s thank, God,” Luke said and they knelt and gave their thanks to the God they both had learned to have faith in. 

That night Luke finished the Bible story about Ruth and she had a fine baby boy with her husband.  They hugged that night in bed thinking it a sign of a happy future for them.